What Weekend?

Well, its friday night (or saturday morning) already, and under normal circumstances, I would be kind of looking forward to the weekend. But having looked at my project deadlines, my weekend is as good as gone. Will spend tomorrow trying to finish up my website and brochure projects, before heading down to a birthday dinner. Sunday is food hunt, so I guess that is a whole sunday gone. Well, I shall take food hunt as one of the final events for me to at least have some fun (unless we are really going to super chiong), before hell really really sets in.

I think it may be another weekend stuck in school, and I don't at all like it, not because I want to go home and relax and sleep, but its just that I would personally want to spend some time at home with mum and dad. This especially so when I usually spend only 1-2 days of a week at home.

Once again, another 21st birthday party, and it was yet another blast. Sure hope Kaiwei enjoyed herself, because most of us sure did. Think Zhimin did a great job, seriously (with all teasing jokes aside), and most of us agreed that this was one of the most unique birthday party celebrations ever. Unique, yet special and enjoyable.

Something's wrong with me ...

The Semester So Far

Am in the library now, and was planning to do my Japanese studies project, but somehow or rather after sitting here for an hour or so, I am not started yet. Don't really have the motivation to do any work. A chat last night ignited some thoughts I never thought would surface.

For someone who hates to look back to regret, I take great care whenever decision making is involved. At times, I am personally assured of making the right decisions. At times, I sit back to realise that I could have possibly made a better decision. As for the issue raised last night, I am still assured that I made a right decision. But when certain things happen (or have been happening), I can't help but wonder if I could have made a better decision. Well ...

Also taking this chance to take a look at the semester so far. It has been 10 weeks just like that, and it has been to me the slackest semester so far. I am somewhat worried that the slackness will be translated to the results I get at the end of the semester. I can't seem to find back the usual gan chiong and project-oriented me. Finished another intro to computing presentation yesterday, and yes, last minute-ness again. Although I must say we do really well for last minute-ness. Many many assignments coming up, and if I really take a look at the calendar, I am actually kind of doomed already. But not sure why, I am not the least worried. Something's wrong.

Horrible

Things are finally starting to look like last semester, and its nothing good. Last week was quite some hell, and this week is going to be worse, and I'm sure it will go on and on until the finals.

Went to watch Horton, and it was totally horrible. A total waste of money. I have high expectations of animation movies, as all I have seen previously very good. The Incredibles, Ratatouille, Ice Age, Monsters Inc, etc etc, but this one didn't have a storyline, there was totally no link, the story idea was horrid, and the jokes were not funny at all. It didn't help that they had to show the short preview of Wall-E, Kungfu Panda and Ice Age 3 before the movie, which just made Horton look read bad. I fell asleep inside the cinema, and guess what, so did my gf. It the end, we did something we never thought we would have done. And that is to stand up and walk out halfway through the movie. Yes, it was that bad.

Not sure its the after effects on sunburnt, or the rain yesterday, but am feeling a little queer today. Not the right time at all to fall sick.

Beach Fiesta 08

Well, just back from beach fiesta, all dirty, tired and burnt. It was quite a day indeed. As per usual, with every end of a significant event, I will have thoughts running through my head, translating to the words in my blog of course.

Beach Fiesta is a little more special for me this year, as not only am I in the organizing committee, but also because this event is one of the few which I will be involved in this year. A stark contrast from last year, where I was by left or right involved in almost every single project.

Overall, I would dare say it is by far one of the largest, if not the largest event ever organized by arts club (fop aside). Well, we didn't really plan it to be, but it turned out to be. And I seriously think that this sets a good platform for future batches, as seriously, this event was almost like an event organized by the entire NUS or the sports club of NUS. I am sure not many would have imagined that it was just a faculty club organizing such a big scale event. After settling my registration, I took a look around tanjong beach, as it was amazing to know that all those people out there were all involved in beach fiesta. A total of 62 teams, and 394 participants. Beat that!

Of course, with every event, there will be some minor screw ups and mishaps. For today, some here and some there, but the major one was the rain hitting us near the end of the event. Well, that may have dampened some spirits, but I think overall it was well handled and the event went well.

Being involved in events planning since my poly days, I have heard lots of critical comments during and after events. People will say why this bad thing happens, why that bad thing happens, but fail to look at the brigther side of things. For example for today, some say that the rain at the end spoiled the whole thing, but I personally saw it as a blessing that we had more than 3/4 of the event with a good weather. Many fail to realise that the strange La Nina that hit Singapore has not tided over, and that weather forecast for today was actually thunderstorms. We were indeed very blessed already.

Some also questioned why certain things were managed in some ways, but I usually tend to ignore or rebut such remarks. I think one needs to really have been in the shoes of being a PD for a large scale event, to know why certain decisions are made in certain ways.

Overall, I would say that I was impressed with what I saw today. Seriously, the positives I saw totally outweighed the mishaps and misfortunes that happened today. No event will ever be perfect, and as much as people will always look at an event from the 'outside', I always hold this personal believe that the 'inside' of the event, like committee management and commitment, should also determine the success of an event. I saw hardwork, great commitment, great determination, great decision making, never-say-die attitudes, and worthy characters today. That itself would be for me, enough to determine that beach fiesta 08 was a success!

Too Practical?

A sudden and random thought came to my head amidst rushing my assignment, and its probably going to be a little confusing than usual.

Many always say kids are lucky, for they can just do what they like without any concerns or worries. But for any normal grown up, we will always ask ourselves why we do certain things, as there should always be a reason for doing anything. As a matter of fact, the reason will usually relate to some personal gain one way or another. It is after all human nature to be selfish and greedy. The practicality of mankind.

However, it is of course possible there is still that side in all of us which tells us to 'just do it'. There are somethings in which when we are doing it, or after we have done it, we cannot still answer the 'why we did it' question. Citing an example, would of course be arts club matters. Yes, there is a side of us which approaches the matter in a more practical way, like for cca points, for cv, for experience, but then again, there is another side which forsakes all these personal gains, as we 'just do it'. Somewhat unexplainable.

I did mention during the last AGM that up till the day of stepping down, I still did not really know why I stood up to run for the management committee. But it never really bothered me, as I was just sure that I was doing what I wanted to do. It was just 'me' to want to be involved in co-curricular activities. In the end, I gained more that I hoped for, especially friendship.

The sad thing though, is that some people I know can be just so practical. A mask worn shows the commitment and 'just do it' attitude, but beneath the mask is a hidden practical agenda. They always say you can see the true colours of one during the midst of all the 'shit', but what I have seen is that you can also see the true colours after all the 'shit' is over.

Confused? Yeah, this is one of those entry I just wanted to rant but didn't really know how to express myself :p

Finally, Hell Week

Its a stark contrast that hell week has only arrived in my 9th week this semester. I remember how hell week arrived in week 5-6 last semester, and it was hell all the way to the finals. Just goes to show how slack this semester has been (or perhaps how slack I have been).

I have 2 assignments due on thursday, and have at least 3 deadlines to meet by the start of next week. Furthermore, the rest of the week will be filled with project meetings, and to cap the week off, beach fiesta is on saturday. Oh well, things are finally starting to get all so familiar.

Got back my only mid term result, and strangely, I managed to do quite well, considering how statistically troubled I was. To be very honest, on many occasions this semester, I prolly got much higher marks then I thought I deserved this semester. Comparing again to last semester, I kinda didn't 'piah' as much, but thankfully lady luck is perhaps on my side. Then again, I got this feeling its also because I have set expectations at a much lower level, and the pressure is off. As I was telling Pearl, I had high hopes on media writing assignments last semester, and all 3 papers including the final project turned out to be disaster. So whenever I received back my grades and papers this semester, I will always approach it with a much lighter heart, and it probably justifies why I am not complaining that much this semester. To think of it, this should be the correct approach I should strive for.

Oh, I can officially declare that intro to computing is the module which I have slacked the most. I have skipped 4 or 5 straight lectures, did all my presentations and assignments right at the last minute, and for the upcoming presentation, it is probably going to be another last minute and smoking effort. I must admit that if results come back horrible, I only have myself to blame. Oh well, shall make do with what I can in the last few weeks.

Internship. I think it has been more than a month since my interview, but I have still not been accepted. The good news is that they called me again yesterday, and I was happy to hear that I did pass the interview, but there seems to be some other things to settle before they can confirm my internship. So, I am still left a little confused on whether I got it or not, or whether a bomb will suddenly drop on me stating that I did not get the position. My hopes of wanting to intern there still stands after this long wait, as I feel that it is an opportunity not to be missed.

I think before I know it, the next few weeks will fly by. Very soon, exams, internship (hopefully), FOP, and then Hong Kong.

A Different Meaning to Busy

It's been a while since I last blogged, and once again, I guess its kinda because I am less centered into my studies this semester, and have less to complain on my blog.

The last week has been a cold and wet one, and I was again kinda busy. But this time round, I was not really busy with school work. I was kinda tied up with arts club stuff, and it reminded me of my time in MC last year. Alot of rushing and administrative work here and there, but well, I guess this kinda work is just something I am so used to doing since my secondary school days. When I chose not to re-run, I made a promise to help out whenever I can, because I know the about the workload and pressure the new committee had staring in their face. And I am glad that I am living up to what I said I would do, well to my minimal expectations at least. Lets hope the upcoming run of projects will be a successful one. A message to the 28th, anyone reading this of course, the fruits of the labour will only come after the event itself. Many a times during the planning and preparation stages, we keep asking ourselves why we are doing this. Well, the answer is always right at the end there.

Just came back from cherie's bday party, and thanks cherie for the wonderful party. Had fun, both at the party, and of course dressing up as a bandit cowboy wannabe. Had to ransack my family's wardrobe to see what I could wear, and finally managed to get stuff from here and there to get my attire. Haha, some of the rest had amazing attires, especially caleb. Nonetheless, I still love my gun the most, haha. Was speaking to caleb, and we were saying how this was the first time we had to dress up for a party, but it turned out to be real cool. Haha from another perspective, I'm really glad to have this opportunity, because as I grow older, I really don't see myself doing this anymore. It's an experience to remember :) Bang! Bang!!

That Sunday Feeling

First, soccer. It has been a disappointing weekend, as blackburn suffered a double whammy. First, we actually drew with fulham, a game which I expected us to win confidently. I guess its just blackburn, to always underperform against teams struggling with relegation. We kinda struggled against derby but pulled off a win, we were very fortunate in our win against newcastle, and now, fulham 1-1. Bleah. To make things worse, both man utd and chelsea were surprisingly knocked out of the FA Cup, meaning that blackburn now need to get 5th for a uefa cup spot. Considering how high everton are flying now, chances are bleak. Blackburn has fallen to their number one foe again, Mr Consistency.

Oh, and cardiff are actually leading boro now, so it will be quite a strange FA cup this time round. If cardiff pull off the victory, there will be just one premiership side left in the FA Cup, pompey. I am starting to imagine how strange it would be if the final sees no premiership side in it if pompey loses their semis. Good news for the progression of teams out of the premieship, but bad news if we want a majestic cup final. I think the bookies are laughing their way to the banks this weekend.

Enough of soccer. While coming back to school just now, I had that sunday feeling again. That book-in like feeling. Don't know why. Eventhough I know that the feeling will never be as bad as my sunday book-ins into OCS, but I guess I'm feeling a little sian because back to school means another week of assignments and lectures. Its going to be week 8, and still very scarily, I am not feeling any pressure yet, although the deadlines ahead look pretty packed and scary.

School Aside

Received an e-mail today which initially left me a little upset and dejected, but I soon got a relief to the news. The civil service internship coordinator sent an e-mail to a few students, including me, saying that we were not matched to any organization, and that we could try again in the next round. When I first read the message, I was a little confused as I was already 'matched', as I have gone for an interivew. It was just that I was not selected yet. However, I started to think that was this the so called 'reply' to indicate that I kinda didn't make it for the internship position? So I sent a mail to clarify, and thank goodness it was all a misunderstanding. So, no news still means good news, as I continue to await for the chance to do my internship.

Was speaking to my japanses studies project mate today, who apparently is one of the top marketing students in bizad. He was busy with his thesis, yet was feeling a little assured of his path ahead as he has already secured a job. His starting pay looks good, although I must say I was expecting him to get something much more, taking into account his credentials. But oh well, as I mentioned before, sometimes its not just the credentials, but also the opportunity. Speaking about opportunity, one has come my way as I received a letter for a career talk. It states 'selected students', something which i am so not used to, and I don't really know what the scope of 'selected is'. Nonetheless, it may shine a light for my path ahead, so I'll see what it's all about.

I must admit that I am more laid back about school this semester. I am taking the assignments as they come, being even more last minute than before. I used to take every single percentage into consideration when doing my modules, and not that I don't anymore, but I don't seem to brood so much about it anymore. Good or bad, not sure.

On a very personal note, I also realised that I need to spend more time with my gf. Another weekend rushing project in school last week meant another weekend we couldn't meet. I know that on no basis should I really be putting my relationship next to studies as a comparison, but I have done so much just to ensure good grades and perhaps a better future, forgeting that I actually needed to do the same to ensure a happy life ahead. I seldom blog about my relationship, but I guess I'm doing this to remind myself that at times, I really just need to put school aside.

School Restarts

The one week break ends just like that, and as per every break, it ends up rather fruitless. The next few weeks ahead is gonna be pretty rough, but oh well. Handed in my website assignment yesterday, and again it was all last minute rushing. The deadline was strangely on a Sunday, so that meant that I had to spend the entire weekend in school.

It has been a while since I complained about school, so let me start right now. This is not the first time, but I was kinda pissed yesterday because of the project. Being the only one who had the advantage (or disadvantage) of knowing how to make a website, I didn't mind taking on the extra job of designing and creating the website. Being the only one staying on campus, I didn't mind staying back to hand in the report at 12 noon on a Sunday. But what I did mind was that some of the research given to me to put into the website turned out kinda 'not-here-not-there'. Eventually, it meant more work on my hand. Sometimes I really wonder what group work really means. Well, there was someone who stayed up on saturday night to help me finalise the stuff, but am kinda dissed at how some others just couldn't really be bothered about it. I bet if I didn't even finish the website or submit the report, they wouldn't even know, and wouldn't even be bothered.

When we normally work with others, and when someone fails to do his part or work, we can usually say, nevermind let him be punished and he will learn his lesson. But the same cannot be applied to projects. If we let him die, we will all die, so the only way is to suck it up and do his part for him. Sure, peer evaluation helps at times, but by how much. It didn't help that this project didn't have a peer eval system.