A Short Rest
Finally managed to get some rest today. Home just feels so good, being able to eat food that is not from school, being able watch tv, and just play games and relax all the way. However, I must admit that at the back of my mind, school work and assignments still linger. To be honest, that is what I totally detest about my life right now. School work and assignment is always on my mind, and I just hate this feeling.
I just had another test on saturday, and yet again, not for the first time this semester, the test left me rather upset. Never did I expect the questions to be like 'Draw a diagram', when all I studied were bullet points and definitions. In the end, I was kinda crapping my way through, and there was even one question whereby I totally left blank. Just didn't know what it wanted, and I'm quite sure I won't do well.
Yup so there I go complaining about my school work again. I realised that I did not really complain that much last semester, despite having arts club commitments to juggle along with school work, so I started to wonder why. And to think of it, I believe its because of the higher level of expectations I have set for myself. Of course I am not complaining about doing well last semester, but somehow or rather, it is adding quite alot of pressure on myself. Been reading Bing De's blog also, and I can tell that he too is very stressed and frustrated about his school work, as he also feels the pressure.
Suddenly, just suddenly, I feel like just going through the motion, and not care. My mum asked me today how school was, and I replied saying its much tougher this semester. I guess she could see the distraught on my face, and she went on to say that it's ok for me to just clear my modules, and that I don't really have to push myself too hard. It felt good hearing that from her, as I know that my parents never want to put any pressure on me. But I guess it's just in me to want to go a step further, and to do well to make them happy.
I will never forget how happy and proud my parents were, when I went on stage to receive my poly diploma, when I was recognised as platoon best at my BMT POP, when I was commissioned as an officer, and when I went against odds and made it into NUS. That is why I want to do all I can to at least do relatively well in what is perhaps my final stage of education, and I want to see the happy and proud faces of my parents again.
I just had another test on saturday, and yet again, not for the first time this semester, the test left me rather upset. Never did I expect the questions to be like 'Draw a diagram', when all I studied were bullet points and definitions. In the end, I was kinda crapping my way through, and there was even one question whereby I totally left blank. Just didn't know what it wanted, and I'm quite sure I won't do well.
Yup so there I go complaining about my school work again. I realised that I did not really complain that much last semester, despite having arts club commitments to juggle along with school work, so I started to wonder why. And to think of it, I believe its because of the higher level of expectations I have set for myself. Of course I am not complaining about doing well last semester, but somehow or rather, it is adding quite alot of pressure on myself. Been reading Bing De's blog also, and I can tell that he too is very stressed and frustrated about his school work, as he also feels the pressure.
Suddenly, just suddenly, I feel like just going through the motion, and not care. My mum asked me today how school was, and I replied saying its much tougher this semester. I guess she could see the distraught on my face, and she went on to say that it's ok for me to just clear my modules, and that I don't really have to push myself too hard. It felt good hearing that from her, as I know that my parents never want to put any pressure on me. But I guess it's just in me to want to go a step further, and to do well to make them happy.
I will never forget how happy and proud my parents were, when I went on stage to receive my poly diploma, when I was recognised as platoon best at my BMT POP, when I was commissioned as an officer, and when I went against odds and made it into NUS. That is why I want to do all I can to at least do relatively well in what is perhaps my final stage of education, and I want to see the happy and proud faces of my parents again.
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