Neglect

Feeling a little tired and upset. I stayed over the last 2 nights in school, settling reimbursements and balancing accounts. Really feeling very tired, as I have been doing the same things over and over again. I have made many trips to and fro already, in fact 4 trips in all yesterday. I have never taken the internal shuttle buses that many times in a day before. Hmm, I think I must also apologise to everyone who have seen me the last few days, as I am very sure my facial expressions and maybe even my actions have not been the most appropriate the past few days. Also a big thanks to those who have expressed concerns and given encouragements. Very much appreciated.

However, the biggest apologies has to go out to my gf. I have neglected her. In fact I have done so alot of times already because of school, but I am feeling a greater pinch during the last few days. I could not find time to meet up with her, and even worse, I could not even find time at night to speak with her on the phone. Even when I had the time last night, I did not really have the energy to speak with her. She messaged me just now asking when we can meet, and when I told her tomorrow night, her reply was "Okay!!". I could tell that she was really happy that we can finally meet. When I saw that message, I was happy, but at the same time very sad. Dunno why I have such mixed feelings, but seeing how happy she was made me feel very guilty. As the saying goes, it takes two hands to clap. In my case, her hand in reaching very far out just to clap mine, and it should never be like that. Why oh why.

Another reason for wanting to have a more peaceful life next semester. And this is a very strong reason, in which no one can doubt me for.